I told myself I would update this blog in earnest, and it’s been sitting here untouched almost a month. I’ve been in a bit of a funk, letting too many non-essential activities (*cough* world of warcraft *cough*) fill my time so that my personal goals were being neglected, it’s a self-perpetrated cycle of apathy really!

Apart from running my avatars through the wilds of Azeroth, I have started pulling stuff together for Stump, of course. Also I am thinking about trying to get a series of seminars and workshops happening. Apart from that and going to work and various domestic and financial duties (yay, tax time – at least I managed to put mine in early this year!!) I have been doing a lot of soul-searching.

I’ve always believed that ultimately – Divine Will aside – we are masters of our own Destiny, that it is up to each of us to work out what we want out of life and to work towards achieving these goals, so that we can look back on our lives and be satisfied with what we accomplished and who we were as people.

I used to think I would be able to do that – there was a lot of stuff in my life that I didn’t like, dark and troubled stuff, mistakes and regrets. But I have accomplished some pretty cool stuff as well, I’ve made some great friends and loved some awesome people. But in the last few years I’ve really lost that momentum. I look at the life I have now and it’s not the life that I want. I am not the person that I wanted to be.

So I need to make the conscious choice to change things, to bring myself back to the point where I can be proud of who I am and what I can accomplish. It’s going to take baby steps, it’s going to take focus and it’s going to take some sacrifice on my part – but with a clear idea of the direction I want to go in, I know I can do it.

On a random note, I was given a crock-pot a few weeks ago!  We had an “international lunch day” at work; I made an attempt on american-style pork & beans and there were lots of other cuisines represented. One woman brought in a crock-pot for reheating food, and I commented that I’d always intended to get one. Since she didn’t really use hers, the next thing I know I’m the proud owner of a crock-pot!! The only stipulation is I have to get an “action shot” for her blog on sustainability and recycling, so must break out the camera and a slow-cooker recipe book this week. :)